2016 was a year of awakening for me. Last year started out so bad that I thought the following months or even the rest of the year was going to be worse. Turns out all those down moments in my life ended up giving me life lessons and realizations, and those bad situations paved way for something much better.
I fell in love with a type of guy who was all out but only in the beginning of the relationship. Turns out he’s one of those guys who plays on girls’ feelings. I left him faster than I said yes to him. My intuition was so strong that every doubt I had for him was true. I have learned a lot from my previous relationships and this one made me realize more that I don’t deserve a half-assed kind of love. I was never heartbroken. In fact, I felt free and happy. Months later, love came back to me again but this time, it feels different. It feels right and it’s far from what I previously had. I have never felt so sure about someone and I’m glad I took the risk even though I was scared that this could turn out the same as my past ones. Sometimes we have to face some obstacles in life to gain wisdom and for us to discover our worth. And now, what I have is more than what I deserve.
In the middle and last part of 2016, I felt really lost regarding with my chosen career that I graduated in. I was working on a plan for years, cos I thought that was the best for me, but I ended up not choosing it. And I thought, wow, I’m such a failure. It’s like nothing ever goes right as planned. I turned down a scholarship a university in abroad has offered. Even though there were discounts, it’s still expensive. I don’t want my parents to spend that much money with having no guarantee if I’ll be successful there, or more importantly, be happy there. I was really thinking about what I truly want and at the end of the day, I always end up choosing happiness. After all, success isn’t worth it when I’m not passionate and when I’m always anxious about it. These early days of 2017, I have learned not to compare myself to others. After all, what I’m doing right now, I’m truly happy about it. I don’t wanna end up like others complaining about going to work after holidays. I got another job and I was so excited to start on it.
Who knows what I’ll be doing next? Maybe I’ll pursue my nursing career, maybe another awesome job, travel the world, perhaps? Whatever it is, as long as my heart and mind are into it, then I’m gonna do it. Life is too short to do something I don’t want to do just to fulfill the expectations of people around me.
2017, I am ready for you! I have never felt this happy and excited about life as I am right now. I hope this year will bring me more wisdom, happiness, adventure, and love.